Law of Mechanical Repair- After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.
Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.
Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Bath -When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.
Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!
Law of Bio mechanics- The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.
The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
12.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
13.Law of Physical Surfaces -
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
14.Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.
Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
Law of Public Speaking -- A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET!
Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy- As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!
Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
BiggarView said
09:14 PM Jan 22, 2015
Been lucky enough to avoid the Mechanical Repair Law.... so far............ no comment on the rest.
Brian
Terry and Jo said
09:33 PM Jan 22, 2015
I was going to say all but the Coffee Law. After all, we are now retired.
But then, I remembered that Jo has always been the boss, so the Coffee Law still applies.
As for the Law of Mechanical Repair, I used to work in agriculture and on numerous occasions had to repack some bearings on a farm implement while still out in the field. When the Law of Mechanical Repair became an issue, our only avenue of fixing things was to "wash" our hands with dirt. That would remove the grease from the hands, and then a wipe with a handy rag would clean off the dirt.
Good to go.
Otherwise, a very good list, Barbara. Now we'll see if others can come up with similar "laws" of non physics.
Terry
53 Merc said
06:52 AM Jan 23, 2015
Law of central location
Any tool dropped while working on any motor vehicle will automatically seek the exact geographical center of said motor vehicle.
BiggarView said
09:31 AM Jan 23, 2015
The Heisenberg RV Uncertainty Principle: The less you know about an RV system or its condition, the greater the probability that it will break or fail before you understand it.
-- Edited by biggaRView on Friday 23rd of January 2015 09:35:55 AM
Bill and Jodee said
10:27 AM Jan 23, 2015
Thanks Barb - these were very fun!!
I wish I could say there was one that I haven't had to learn.....but no, all of them apply.
In addition are
Law of Exit Proximity - related to the arena seats, the person in the back of a packed elevator is always the one who is getting off when the door opens - and no one else is.
Law of Potty Urgency - the least prepared you are for the weather/ground conditions, the longer the dog will take to do her business.
suse1023 said
08:19 AM Jan 24, 2015
The more urgent the need to pee the worse the fumbling for keys ime.
Diana and Jim said
05:51 PM Jan 24, 2015
The Law of Probability usually occurs for me on the first tee. 'Nuff said. :)
Jim
Barbaraok said
10:35 PM Jan 24, 2015
Diana and Jim wrote:
The Law of Probability usually occurs for me on the first tee. 'Nuff said. :)
Jim
And here I thought it was only me that had problems on the first tee! The more people behind us, the more likely I'm going to plunk the ball 50 yards out at best.
Barb
Diana and Jim said
04:59 PM Jan 25, 2015
The beer cart girl cut across the fairway 50 yards in front of me and I hit a low burner and knocked her hubcap off. I didn't see her until the ball left the tee, as I was keeping my eye on the ball! :)
Jim
Terry and Jo said
11:02 PM Jan 25, 2015
Diana and Jim wrote:
The beer cart girl cut across the fairway 50 yards in front of me and I hit a low burner and knocked her hubcap off. I didn't see her until the ball left the tee, as I was keeping my eye on the ball! :)
Jim
You know, there would be some that would question the fact that you missed seeing both the beer and the cart girl. Are we getting the whole story here? I'd think that you might have at least "heard" the cart?
Or, had you "already" found the cart?
Terry
Diana and Jim said
04:39 AM Jan 26, 2015
Just to clarify, we waved her off when she stopped to ask if we wanted anything, and she took off down the path on the right side of the fairway in the trees. I wasn't expecting her to cut across the fairway. No, I hadn't been drinking. :). I'm glad it was just the hubcap that got hit. Anyway, just an example of the Law of Probability.
Jim
-- Edited by Diana and Jim on Monday 26th of January 2015 04:43:28 AM
Terry and Jo said
10:34 AM Jan 26, 2015
Jim,
You wouldn't have been completely at fault anyway. She should have been observant enough to see that someone was preparing to tee off and waited or gone around. She may be one of those vying for the Darwin Award.
Terry
TheHarveys said
08:31 AM Jan 27, 2015
The law of the full trash bag states that "No matter which way you set a full trash bag, it will always fall the in the direction you were trying to avoid."
Been lucky enough to avoid the Mechanical Repair Law.... so far............ no comment on the rest.
Brian
I was going to say all but the Coffee Law. After all, we are now retired.
But then, I remembered that Jo has always been the boss, so the Coffee Law still applies.
As for the Law of Mechanical Repair, I used to work in agriculture and on numerous occasions had to repack some bearings on a farm implement while still out in the field. When the Law of Mechanical Repair became an issue, our only avenue of fixing things was to "wash" our hands with dirt. That would remove the grease from the hands, and then a wipe with a handy rag would clean off the dirt.
Good to go.
Otherwise, a very good list, Barbara. Now we'll see if others can come up with similar "laws" of non physics.
Terry
Any tool dropped while working on any motor vehicle will automatically seek the exact geographical center of said motor vehicle.
The Heisenberg RV Uncertainty Principle: The less you know about an RV system or its condition, the greater the probability that it will break or fail before you understand it.
-- Edited by biggaRView on Friday 23rd of January 2015 09:35:55 AM
I wish I could say there was one that I haven't had to learn.....but no, all of them apply.
In addition are
Law of Exit Proximity - related to the arena seats, the person in the back of a packed elevator is always the one who is getting off when the door opens - and no one else is.
Law of Potty Urgency - the least prepared you are for the weather/ground conditions, the longer the dog will take to do her business.
Jim
And here I thought it was only me that had problems on the first tee! The more people behind us, the more likely I'm going to plunk the ball 50 yards out at best.
Barb
Jim
You know, there would be some that would question the fact that you missed seeing both the beer and the cart girl. Are we getting the whole story here? I'd think that you might have at least "heard" the cart?
Or, had you "already" found the cart?
Terry
Just to clarify, we waved her off when she stopped to ask if we wanted anything, and she took off down the path on the right side of the fairway in the trees. I wasn't expecting her to cut across the fairway. No, I hadn't been drinking. :). I'm glad it was just the hubcap that got hit. Anyway, just an example of the Law of Probability.
Jim
-- Edited by Diana and Jim on Monday 26th of January 2015 04:43:28 AM
Jim,
You wouldn't have been completely at fault anyway. She should have been observant enough to see that someone was preparing to tee off and waited or gone around. She may be one of those vying for the Darwin Award.
Terry