Ok friends and wise ones, I need your help. After 21 months of planning, we are ready to hit the road at the end of this month. I am sooo ready, except I am dreading saying goodbye to my loved ones. I am afraid I will collapse into a blubbering mess . How did you handle this? I have wanted to rv travel my whole life and I am anxious to get going, but man goodbyes just are awful for me.. How did you react with that final "see ya?" I am interested in hearing from both men and women. I have a feeling hubs may get a bit emotional as well. Please tell me your departure story. Thanks!
WestWardHo said
07:07 AM Sep 11, 2014
It's not like you're leaving forever. You'll be back and pass thru more than likely or I should say if you're like us and many others I've read about on this site. Really, you have phones and likely Skype or FaceTime.
Because you're changing your lifestyle it may feel like an end but it's really a beginning or just evolution. I'm frustrated I'm not saying it right in my attempt to support.
Its o.k. to cry. Some of us blubber more than others; no shame in that; in fact it's often endearing.
Sherry
The Sages said
07:20 AM Sep 11, 2014
I think you are saying it perfectly Sherry :) I am probably, as I am prone to, making a bigger deal than it needs to be. I am usually the "strong" person in our family. i have heard many folks say, their relationships have actually deepened through the distance.
NWescapee said
08:42 AM Sep 11, 2014
Not sure I can offer a lot of advice here, I am one of those who can cry easily and certainly did during our final transition. I think some of the sadness was replaced by the excitement and relief of finally getting on the road.
Express your emotions, those who care about you will understand. They'll have their own emotions to deal with as well.
PIEERE said
08:50 AM Sep 11, 2014
Once your down the road a few hundred miles one gets overwhelmed with excitement of new horizons! Not saying it's not sad to leave relatives. I usually say "See Ya Later"! That is better to me than Goodbye!
MarkS said
09:07 AM Sep 11, 2014
I have a simple solution. Thirty years ago move away from them. Then when you go full time you will be happy because you can go see them anytime you want.
It worked for me!
Dog Folks said
10:16 AM Sep 11, 2014
Nothing in life is permanent, even life itself.
You are now free to come back and visit anytime.
It does not have to be a "forever" goodbye.
Technomadia said
10:19 AM Sep 11, 2014
It's not 'good bye'.. it 'Until Next Time' :)
That said, it is a tough transition. More than likely, many of your friendships will change as a result of your big change. It's only natural. Some will deepen, you'll be able to rekindle friendships with folks who moved away as you go visit them, etc.
But there are friendships that will distance themselves too. There's only a small handful of friends I had back then that have kept in touch over the years, and that I'll go out of my way to make time for when we're back in town. But those are precious friendships that can endure the various changes we all have over the course of our lives. Not everyone is meant to be in our lives forever.
Cherish the emotions you have ... and then go enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create!
-- Edited by Technomadia on Thursday 11th of September 2014 10:20:16 AM
2riker2go said
01:29 PM Sep 11, 2014
I am the same way! I love our life on the road, and the fact that we can now escape the cold northern winters. We return in the summer to spend four months near family and friends, which is awesome. But then at the end of that time, I feel the same way when we are getting ready to leave, and yes, there are tears!! I try to keep in mind that it's not really "goodbye", it's "see you in a few months"...and once we get back on the road I'm fine. Although by next April when we are heading north, I will be ready to get back and see familiar faces once again!!
The Sages said
01:15 PM Sep 12, 2014
Good to know I am not alone Jessica! I guess I will muddle my way through the goodbyes, and then I look ahead to this wonderful adventure we have worked so hard to make happen.
Camper Chronicles said
07:40 AM Sep 14, 2014
First of all congratulations!!! This has been a long time in coming and good for you. My advice ...own your feelings whatever they are. I won't speak for anyone else, but to me dealing with the emotional aspect of full timing is by far the most important part. Yet although the forum is filled with advice we spend relatively little time talking about those aspects. For me what is helping is the support system I have built with fellow RV dreamers. We text, we talk on the phone, we Facebook, and most importantly we share how we feel...which btw changes some times hourly. This is a VERY emotional experience...you are changing your whole life. So you and your husband get to feel however you feel...it only means this matters to you. Try to be kind to each other though... All of that emotion needs to go somewhere and sometimes it comes out in a negative way on your partner.
Good luck and again congratulations...I am really happy for you :)
The Sages said
08:22 AM Sep 14, 2014
Thanks Trace. That was very well put. I am so looking forward to meeting all of you nice folks on the road. This is a great support system!
Hdrider said
08:43 AM Sep 14, 2014
Like others have said, it does not have to be goodbye. Rather a see ya later. And with the internet, face book, phone calls or even a blog staying in touch is easy.
Heck, we were gone 19 months and when we rolled back in town for a visit it was almost like we never left. We fell right into conversation about things that happened while we were gone just like we had been here to experience them with our friends. And most of them knew about our adventures by reading our blog.
Funny story,,, one of our friends got married while we were on the road and when we got together with them the first time after getting to town we all talked for at least 15 minutes before I said to her,,,, ya know we have never really meet !! We laughed because we felt like we had already known each other because of all the online interaction before that day.
LibertyLinda said
09:22 AM Sep 14, 2014
The Sages
I had no problems being a blubbering mess. And it stuck with me too, in different intensities, at different times, depending on who I am thinking about. Email, phone and Skype help, but the tears will still be there at times. Give yourself permission to go thru this process how you need to - it is part of the journey :)
We are two months into full timing and I am starting to think about our first Christmas away - just another time to be a blubbering mess - no one said you are not allowed to be.
The Sages said
06:53 AM Sep 15, 2014
Oh my, the holidays! fortunately we will be in CA with the oldest son, DIL, and grandson. We have never spent Christmas with this grandson, so I am excited about that! I was the Thanksgiving host for 20+ years for a large noisy (Detroit Lions fans!) group. This year, I will be in TX. Gonna roast a couple Cornish hens polish off a bottle or box of wine and kick back!!! It was a lot of hard work feeding all those people. Hey, I am feeling better already! Linda and all the other blubberer's, we can blubber together...
The Hensons said
10:59 AM Sep 16, 2014
Is Scott a blubbering mess too, Linda? :)
I agree with Linda...allow that process to unfold...it's part of the journey.
I would also say that the time we do visit our families now is much bette quality time!
WanderingWaits said
12:50 PM Sep 20, 2014
We just became full timers from Michigan. I doubt leaving ever really gets easier! But it is always exciting and a chance of a lifetime! I keep in the back of my mind that this is temporary, we an undo this decision anytime. so far there are days We love this life but also many adjustments. Skype and FaceTime make a world of difference too. Give yourself permission to feel sad about leaving , then go and enjoy the adventure. I, like you hosted holiday family days..... Sure enjoying the break from all that work, looking forward todefining a warm place for Thanksgiving.
With that being said, we are 1 hour from hugging our granddaughter after being gone 5 weeks, can hardly contain my excitement. Not sure how I will make it through a whole winter,but airplanes are everywhere! Hope to hear how you do, safe travels.
Marion
Rich and Marion Wait
FOSJ said
01:56 PM Sep 20, 2014
Steve and I have been on the road since March of 2012. The day before we left we had a huge party and invited all our friends and family for one final goodbye. It was an all day event. We hired someone to do the cooking so we could spend time with everyone. We had our motorhome and trailer all set up, as most people had not seen it. I think they all felt better after they saw how we'd be living! (All kinds of things run through people's minds when you say your are going to live fulltime in your rv). We had the best time. It was hard saying goodbye but everyone was so excited for us. Even though we wouldn't be seeing them as often, we knew we'd be back in a few months. The life has been everything we thought it would be!
Because you're changing your lifestyle it may feel like an end but it's really a beginning or just evolution. I'm frustrated I'm not saying it right in my attempt to support.
Its o.k. to cry. Some of us blubber more than others; no shame in that; in fact it's often endearing.
Sherry
I think you are saying it perfectly Sherry :) I am probably, as I am prone to, making a bigger deal than it needs to be. I am usually the "strong" person in our family. i have heard many folks say, their relationships have actually deepened through the distance.
Express your emotions, those who care about you will understand. They'll have their own emotions to deal with as well.
It worked for me!
You are now free to come back and visit anytime.
It does not have to be a "forever" goodbye.
It's not 'good bye'.. it 'Until Next Time' :)
That said, it is a tough transition. More than likely, many of your friendships will change as a result of your big change. It's only natural. Some will deepen, you'll be able to rekindle friendships with folks who moved away as you go visit them, etc.
But there are friendships that will distance themselves too. There's only a small handful of friends I had back then that have kept in touch over the years, and that I'll go out of my way to make time for when we're back in town. But those are precious friendships that can endure the various changes we all have over the course of our lives. Not everyone is meant to be in our lives forever.
Cherish the emotions you have ... and then go enjoy the life you've worked so hard to create!
-- Edited by Technomadia on Thursday 11th of September 2014 10:20:16 AM
Good to know I am not alone Jessica! I guess I will muddle my way through the goodbyes, and then I look ahead to this wonderful adventure we have worked so hard to make happen.
Good luck and again congratulations...I am really happy for you :)
Thanks Trace. That was very well put. I am so looking forward to meeting all of you nice folks on the road. This is a great support system!
Heck, we were gone 19 months and when we rolled back in town for a visit it was almost like we never left. We fell right into conversation about things that happened while we were gone just like we had been here to experience them with our friends. And most of them knew about our adventures by reading our blog.
Funny story,,, one of our friends got married while we were on the road and when we got together with them the first time after getting to town we all talked for at least 15 minutes before I said to her,,,, ya know we have never really meet !! We laughed because we felt like we had already known each other because of all the online interaction before that day.
I had no problems being a blubbering mess. And it stuck with me too, in different intensities, at different times, depending on who I am thinking about. Email, phone and Skype help, but the tears will still be there at times. Give yourself permission to go thru this process how you need to - it is part of the journey :)
We are two months into full timing and I am starting to think about our first Christmas away - just another time to be a blubbering mess - no one said you are not allowed to be.
Oh my, the holidays! fortunately we will be in CA with the oldest son, DIL, and grandson. We have never spent Christmas with this grandson, so I am excited about that! I was the Thanksgiving host for 20+ years for a large noisy (Detroit Lions fans!) group. This year, I will be in TX. Gonna roast a couple Cornish hens polish off a bottle or box of wine and kick back!!! It was a lot of hard work feeding all those people. Hey, I am feeling better already! Linda and all the other blubberer's, we can blubber together...
I agree with Linda...allow that process to unfold...it's part of the journey.
I would also say that the time we do visit our families now is much bette quality time!
We just became full timers from Michigan. I doubt leaving ever really gets easier! But it is always exciting and a chance of a lifetime! I keep in the back of my mind that this is temporary, we an undo this decision anytime. so far there are days We love this life but also many adjustments. Skype and FaceTime make a world of difference too. Give yourself permission to feel sad about leaving , then go and enjoy the adventure. I, like you hosted holiday family days..... Sure enjoying the break from all that work, looking forward todefining a warm place for Thanksgiving.
With that being said, we are 1 hour from hugging our granddaughter after being gone 5 weeks, can hardly contain my excitement. Not sure how I will make it through a whole winter,but airplanes are everywhere! Hope to hear how you do, safe travels.
Marion
Rich and Marion Wait